The “Kill Bill” theme song was ringing in my ears and the sunlight was just setting into my sleepy eyes. It was affirmative; I had woken up on “the wrong side of the bed”. I sighed with exhaustion because I had lost count of the days I had woken up in this manner. I rolled over to the other side of the bed and found even more irritation. “Why is it so bright in here?” I managed to whisper to myself in a stern voice. Oh…this is bad, I’ am getting angry at the sun???
WHY? Why can’t I wake up smiling and sit up in bed, stretch my body and have all the energy to tackle on the day? Why can’t I resemble a slight of courtesy and humanity before I have a sip of coffee? Yes, I will admit it here and now: I love my sleep. I am in love with my bed. Sleep makes me happy and when I have to wake up from my amazing and tender slumber, I’AM MAD! I’ am a morning meanie. Don’t want to be but that’s one of the facts of my life. With that being said, waking up in an already bad mood than I am normally in, is just overwhelming and beyond annoying. So I began to have a mental talk with myself as I wrapped and dug myself deeper into my bed, covers and pillows. “It’s all a state of mind…”
“It’s all a state of mind.” I have heard and read many noted psychologists, preachers and scholars say. I normally roll my eyes and walk away thinking that my emotions were my fault. It’s always my fault! And then I had a thought, “But what if it’s not? What if I really do have an effect on how I feel?” There are days where I do not want to get out of bed, more than I want to admit but then there are days where I feel like the sun is shining just for me and nothing can stop me. Oh No! I’ am bipolar! Nope, just human. I’ am a creature created for and full of emotion but it is my free will to either be a victim or a conqueror of it. Here’s a little dramatic example yet fact: Snakes can go months without eating and when they finally do catch something, not caring what it is, it will eat but suffocate while it eats. I HATE SNAKES! It even gave me hives just writing about them but I found that to be extremely impactful and a lesson. To take it one day at time and not get so caught up and over run with my emotions.
I’ am not saying I’ am going to walk around life like a robot be-boop-bopping around days but just take in account that life is not all roses, unicorns and rains gumdrops and Skittles. There have and will be days when I will just hate the sun for its warmth and glow. Look up at the sky and shake my fist looking completely crazy and not giving a damn! Yet there have and will be days when my eyes are over filled with tears of joy and uncontrollable laughs that tickle my soul. There and have been days when I know that God has made the wind blow just to remind me He is there. There and have been good and bad surprises but I can’t let that trip me up but if it does, I will get up and dust myself off and try and try again. I have a life experience of dusting myself off. I’ am a pro.
xoxo,
@BMynroe
RaChelle-Denise McKinney
RaChelle-Denise McKinney
