They say that you can NEVER get a second chance to make a great first impression. So let me put my thinking cap on and try my damnest to pull out some tricks to “razzle-dazzle” (business nickname…long story and another time and blog) you. Hmm....I am more of a "do-er” than a "talker". So many "bloggers" are guilty of "talking the talk" yet failing to "walk the walk". Too bad blogs don’t come with its own camera crew and production team because I would be able to SHOW you better than I can tell you, but that doesn’t mean I can’t try ;-)
I would describe myself as a girl who lives life as though she has been in the spotlight for years and is a celebrity in her own “Hollywood”. I don’t need a fan base over a million people or my face plastered over gossip magazines (which happen to be one of my most expensive guilty pleasures) discussing who I am “allegedly” dating (there aren’t enough magazine layouts in the world) and snapshots of my “casual wear” (my style ranges from Hobo , Valley Girl, or New Yorkie…it depends what I am feeling that day, ya know? ).
I live like that already, I have been for a while and always will. I walk and live life with Kayne West’s “Flashing Lights” playing as my background music on repeat. I don’t lean on people’s approval to determine if I am hot or not, class or trash, bitch or lady, etc. It really doesn’t matter and honestly…never will. It’s a free country and my President is Black, so EVERYONE is entitled to their opinion and I hold no position to make you change it…just like I hold no position to sit down and listen and take notes to everyone’s critique of me. O_O…you’re joking right.
Let’s see…I am single, free to mingle but refuse to dangle, meaning just because I am single does not label me as “available”. That seems to get lost in translation. You see…I am SINGLE not AVAILABLE and TAKING APPLICATIONS! That position has already been filled and taken by yours truly.
You see…I understand I am a complicated woman and that I come with many angles, departments and closets, I am woman enough to admit that. And due to such self-discovery and realization I don’t see the point or the time in trying to prove to someone that I am capable of loving and understanding. I don’t understand the concept of making someone do what they are CLEARLY not capable of doing. When did that become what the kool kids are doing these days? Explain that to me….
While someone, somewhere comes up with some explanation to such buffoonery, I will stay in my lane and have a very exciting and enticing threesome with my favorite ladies: Me, Myself and I ;)
Now, don’t think that I am just another bitter “young black female who suppresses her fears of love due to her upbringing, seeing the extreme complications between her parents that progressed to slowly scarring her faith and hope in love”….trust me I have read enough psychology articles then I care to admit. I will admit, yes, I am a product of my conditions, I am human and as being human I have been conditioned but just because I have been conditioned does not mean I have not evolved. STAY WITH ME…I KNOW IT MAY GET KINDA “WORDY”, THAT’S THAT COLLEGE EDUCATION SEEPING OUT.
I didn’t take the disadvantages and unfortunates that popped in and out my life and use them as “excuses”, for example, “I am a bitch because I don’t want to be taken advantage of like when I was younger,”. No. “I have the tendency to be aggressive because some people have a harder time understanding how I operate,” …see how much better that sounded?
Like I confessed before, I am a very complicated young lady and according to my mama, yes mama, “mom” has always been so cold and informal to me, “mama” has more of a warmth and praise to it, doesn’t it…anyways, where was I...*rewinding*…Mama tells me “Baby, you meaner than a yard dog.” O_O yea…she’s country. And like I said before, I was conditioned.
Tiny Confession: In school, I was bullied and teased constantly. I was never pretty enough. I was never thin enough. I was never petite enough. I was never light enough. I was never “big-bootyied” enough. I was never down enough. I was never popular enough. I was never stylish enough. I was never cool enough, according to the cool kids in school. Hmm….wonder where THEY are now? You will find them at your local supermarket during food stamp week with at least 3 kids in tow, all have different daddies and their monthly stop at the local supermarket is their much anticipated field trip. It’s brightens their lives. I know it’s harsh to say and really bitchy but it’s the truth. That is what the “cool kids” are doing these days. So it’s fair to say I am a loner and marches to the beat of my own drum. I have never been “cool”. LOL
Back to me, I am a tall lady, 5’11 I say, but according to shorter ex boyfriends, I am at least 6 feet, huge REAL GOD GIVEN boobs, (36 G, *sigh* Yes, they make bras in G size *eye roll*) and I am a size 10-12 (NOPE! No shame in being a double digit girl) so you do the math and size the proportions (36-31-42) and built me together in your mind. I swear it will be so much fun!!! ;-) So yes, I am a “Glamazon”: glamorous Amazon. And the crazy thing is…I have the “Jessica Rabbit” syndrome. I am attracted and go for shorter guys who have an insane and charming sense of humor. Like She said, “If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything.”- Marilyn Monroe
I am a book judged by the cover EVERYTIME and I have come to accept that, which is why I don’t really hang myself about “first impressions”. Why would I wreck my brain trying to come off a certain way to someone when as SOON as they see me, they assume they know my whole life’s story? Kinda irrelevant don’t you think? I see such as a curse and a blessing.
For instance, my two VERY best friend, confessed so calmly to me that they didn’t like me when they first saw me. O_O ??? I had to investigate more. “Why?” I asked looking a little hurt, I mean come on, my BFF’s Von (4 yrs) and Zack (9 yrs) just said they didn’t like me when we first met. These people are like my family…WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DIDN’T LIKE ME? Von explained it the best way she could while we were battling over the vanity mirror in our apartment. She was flat ironing her hair and I was retouching my makeup. “Well…when I first saw you, all I saw was hair and boobs. Really big boobs.” I looked down to investigate my bosom and cupped them for reassurance on their size, yep still “really big boobs”. She continued, “And I remember you were flipping your hair every chance you got. And I was like…’What black girl whips her hair like that? F**k she think she is?’” Needless to say…I was a little taken back but she brought me back to life. “But…after realizing you were my roommate and getting to know you and they way you are, you are one of the best people I know and I love you so much. And plus, I am happy you’re my BFF, you fucking beautiful” =D MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
So you see lovies, I don’t try to get people to like me, I don’t put on a show for people, I am not fake, I am not “regular”…I am ME! My BFF’s weren’t even impressed with my first impressions that I subconsciously gave. They thought I was, what’s the word, “too much”? And like them, a lesson is always to be learned with me. I am educational baby, you learn to love me or hate me a little more each day. The decision is yours. ;-)
xoxo,
@BMynroe
RaChelle-Denise McKinney
@BMynroe
RaChelle-Denise McKinney
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